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The best jokes and joke writers!

The Right Stuff

A man is ice-fishing on a frozen lake and not having much luck. A small boy comes along, bores a hole in the ice a short distance away and starts fishing himself . After a few minutes the boy catches a huge fish. A few minutes later another large fish is caught, then another, then another. The man is mystified and, after the boy has caught his fifth fish, he goes over to investigate. “Hey, son,” says the man. “What’s your secret?” The boy replies, “Yu haf tu kip yr wrms wrm.” “What was that?” says the man. The boy spits into a bucket, “I said, “You have to keep your worms warm.”’

Dropped Your Wallet

Two fishermen were out on the lake when one of them dropped his wallet. As they watched the wallet float down to the depths of the lake, a carp came along and snatched up the wallet. Soon came another carp who stole it away and then a third joined in. Remarked one of the fisherman, "That's the first time I've ever seen carp-to-carp walleting."

Caught Many Fish

A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he. On the way to the cleaning shed, he ran into a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman and said, "Only caught one, eh?"

Going Fishing

Going fishing was very much like making love to a beautiful woman. First of all, clean and inspect your tackle, carefully pull back your rod cover, and remove any dirt or grunge that may have built up whilst not in use. Then, extend your rod to its full length, and check that there are no kinks or any wear. Particularly at the base, where the grip is usually applied. Make sure you've got a decent float, the appropriate bait, and that there's plenty of shot in your bag.

One Wish Fishing

Two men were out fishing, when they found a lamp floating in the water. One of the men picked it up and rubbed it, causing a genie to explode from the lamp. Unfortunately, it was a very low-level genie and could only grant one wish. The men thought for a few minutes and then wished for the entire lake to be made of the best beer in the world. With a poof! the wish was granted. All of a sudden, one of the men got really angry. "Dammit! Now we have to piss in the boat!"