Female Dentist

I would like to see a woman dentist, says the man to the dental receptionist. "Why?" asks the receptionist. "I'd like to hear a woman say 'open your mouth,' instead of 'shut up."

Man In Supermarket

Man walks into a supermarket and buys: 1 bar of soap, 1 toothbrush, 1 tube toothpaste, 1 loaf of bread, 1 pint of milk, 1 single serving cereal, 1 single serving frozen dinner. The girl at the checkout looks at him and says "Single are you?" The man replies very sarcastically
"How did you guess?" She replies
"Because you're ugly."

Own Mind

He says he has a mind of his own. He's welcome to it-- who else would want it?