Bumper Stickers

• Clinton doesn't inhale, he sucks
• USE CAUTION! 90% of people are made by accident.
• It's a dog eat dog world... and I'm wearing milkbone underwear!!!
• I break for hallucinations
• My Lawyer Can Beat Your Lawyer
• Blondes Are Not Dumb (the bumper sticker was upside-down)
• DADDY FARTED AND WE CAN'T GET OUT!!
• IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY DRIVING, STAY OFF THE SIDEWALK!!!
• Nuck Fewt
• ORGASM DONOR
• My child made Student of the Month at Juvenile Hall
• No radio. Already stolen.
• Want a taste of religion? Bite a minister.
• So many pedestrians, so little time.
• My other wife is beautiful.
• I need someone really bad. Are you really bad?
• Don't laugh. Your daughter could be in this vehicle.
• There is one in every crowd and they always find me.
• I love animals - They taste great!
• I'd rather step in shit than smoke it.
• Unless you are a hemorrhoid - get off my ass!
• On the back of a caterer's truck: "Nobody beats our meat!"

Lawyers and Sperm

Q: What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
A: They both hope to be human someday.

Old Oral Sex

Q: How do old people have oral sex?
A: They talk about it.