The Priest Rang the Bell

A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street.  However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach.  After watching the boys efforts for some time, the priest moves closer to the boys position.  He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives the doorbell a soild ring.  Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiles benevolently and asks, "And now what, my little man?"  To which the boy replies, "Now we run!"

Heavenly Golf

Moses, Jesus and an old man are golfing. Moses steps up to the tee and hits the ball. The ball goes sailing over the fairway and lands in the water trap, so Moses parts the water and chips the ball onto the green. Jesus steps up to the tee and hits the ball. It goes sailing over the fairway and lands in the water trap, so Jesus just walks on the water and chips the ball onto the green. The old man steps up to the tee and hits the ball. It goes sailing over the fairway and heads for the water trap. However, just before it falls into the water, a fish jumps up and grabs the ball in it's mouth. As the fish is falling back down into the water, an eagle swoops down and grabs the fish in its claws. The eagle flies over the green where a lightning bolt shoots from the sky and barely misses it. Startled, the eagle drops the fish. When the fish hits the ground, the ball pops out of its mouth and rolls into the hole for a hole-in-one. Jesus then turns to the old man and says, "Dad, if you don't stop fooling around, we won't bring you next time."

Catholic Porn Film

Q: Have you seen the hottest new Catholic porn film?
A: It's 10 minutes of sex and 50 minutes of guilt.