Satan Talk

Two boys walk home from Sunday school after hearing a powerful sermon on the devil. One boy says, "I'm really scared about all this Satan stuff." The other boy replies, "Don't worry. You know how Santa Claus turned out. It's probably just your dad again."

Lawyer at the Pearly Gates

A prominent young attorney was on his way to court to begin arguments on a complex lawsuit when he suddenly found himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter started to escort him inside, when he began to protest that his untimely death had to be some sort of mistake. "I'm much too young to die! I'm only 35!" St. Peter agreed that 35 did seem to be a bit young to be entering the pearly gates, and agreed to check on his case. After investigating, he told the attorney, "I'm afraid that there is no mistake my son. We verified your age on the basis of the number of hours you've billed to your clients, and you're at least 108 years old!"

The Priest Rang the Bell

A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street.  However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach.  After watching the boys efforts for some time, the priest moves closer to the boys position.  He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives the doorbell a soild ring.  Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiles benevolently and asks, "And now what, my little man?"  To which the boy replies, "Now we run!"