Get Married

Little Johnny comes into the house for dinner after playing outside all afternoon. His parents ask him what he did today. He says that he played baseball and then he proposed to Betty (age 7) the next door neighbor. They are going to get married. His parents think this is cute, and they don't want to make fun of Johnny so they ask Johnny him, "How are you and Betty going to pay for the expenses of being married?" He replies, "Well with the $1 I get each week from you and the $1 she gets from her Mom and Dad, we should do o.k." His father says "That's fine, but how will you pay the extra expenses if you and Betty have a baby?" Johnny answers, "Well, so far, we've been lucky..."

She-Devil

There is a man who goes out drinking all the time and comes home very later every night. So on Halloween, his wife decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan, and hides in the dark to scare him when he gets home. The man comes home, and his wife jumps out and screams in his face. He just looks at her and says, ''You don't scare me I'm married to your sister!'''

Good Fairy

Ben and Jill are both 60 years old and have been married for 40 years. One day they go for a walk and all of a sudden a good fairy stands in front of them and says, “You’ve been married for so long and you’re so cute together, I’ll grant you a wish each.” The woman is beside herself with joy and wishes for a trip to Thailand. Poof – she’s holding two tickets to Thailand and a five star hotel voucher for two.
The man says, “Wow, that’s one chance in a lifetime! I’m sorry, darling, but I wish I had a wife that’s 30 years younger than me.” “Are you sure?” asks the fairy.
“Yes!” replies Ben without hesitation.
Poof once more – and he’s 90.