Relationship Jokes - Man Criticizes Woman

CIA Assassin Interview

After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists for the CIA assassin position — two men and one woman.  For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her."  The first man said. "You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife."  The agent replies, "Then you’re not the right man for this job."  The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can’t kill my wife!" The agent replies "You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."  Finally, it was the woman’s turn. Only she was told to kill her husband.  She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn’t tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. So I had to beat him to death with the chair!"

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Profession Jokes (Bureaucrat Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Wife vs Job

Q: What's the difference between your wife and your job?
A: After five years your job will still suck.

Categories: Sex Jokes (Oral Sex Jokes) , Sexist Jokes (About Women) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Work & Office Jokes , Riddles
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Cheating Wife

A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I should do?" "Relax," says the doctor, "Take a deep breath and calm down. Now, tell me, exactly where is Larry's bar?"

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Sexist Jokes (About Women) , Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Profession Jokes (Psychiatrist Jokes)
Anonymous