Mid-Term Accident

A bus load of politicians were driving down a country road after a mid-term election party, when all of a sudden, the bus ran off the road and crashed into a tree in an old farmer's field. Seeing what happened, the old farmer went over to investigate. He then proceeded to dig a hole and bury the politicians. A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus, and asked the old farmer, "Were they all dead?" The old farmer replied, "Well, some of them said they weren't, but you know how them politicians lie."

Clinton Bumper Stickers

Here are some "actual" bumper stickers reportedly seen on cars around the DC area:

• HONK! If you had sex with the President
• Clinton: We forgive you...Now Resign!
• Al Gore: One heartthrob from the Presidency
• Adultery IS NOT a family value
• Does character matter YET?
• One More Whore And We Get Gore
• Bill Clinton: Commander in Heat
• My President Fooled Around with Your Honor Student
• Jail to the Chief
• Today kids no longer play doctor, they play President
• The Clinton Creed: Take Credit Not Responsibility
• If his private life doesn't matter, let him date your daughter.
• Save the President: Legalize Perjury
• Two terms for Clinton: the second in jail
• Clinton: Our Nation's Fondling Father

Medical Advancement

A British doctor says, "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another man, and have him looking for work in six weeks." A German doctor says, "That's nothing. We can take a lung out of one person, put it in another man, and have him looking for work in four weeks." A Russian doctor says, "In my country, medicine is so advanced we take half a heart out of one person, put it in another man, and have both of them looking for work in two weeks." The American doctor, not to be outdone, says, "You guys are way behind us. We just took a man with no brain out of Texas, put him in the White House, and now half the country is looking for work.