Political Jokes

Q: What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?

A: 1 U.S. leader!

Q: What is Russia going to do since Trump struck Syria?

A: Vote Democratic in the next election.

A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write GOD a letter requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to GOD USA, they decided to send it to the President. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill. The President thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank you note to GOD, which read: Dear GOD, Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington D.C. and, as usual, those idiots deducted $95.00!

Did You hear that Bill Clinton tried to kill himself? Yea he try to O.D. on Viagra and beat himself to death!

One day there were these three boys walking down the street, all of a sudden they heard a yell: 'HELP! HELP!'  When the boys got to the noise they saw Bill Clinton in a lake drowning. The three boys saved him from drowning.  Bill Clinton asks the first boy how he could ever repay him. The boy said, 'I want a boat.' The second boy said 'I want a truck.' And the third boy said, 'I want three tombstones with our names  on them.'  Bill Clinton said, 'why is that son?' The little boy said, 'because when my Dad finds out that we saved you, he is going to kill us all!'