Q: What did the number zero say to the number eight?
A: Why have you got your belt pulled so tight?
Q: Did you here about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers?
A: He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
He Is On The Outside
An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are trying to set up a fenced- in area for some sheep, but they have a limited amount of building material. The engineer gets up first and makes a square fence with the material, reasoning that it's a pretty good working solution. "No no," says the physicist, "there's a better way." He takes the fence and makes a circular pen, showing how it encompasses the maximum possible space with the given material. Then the mathematician speaks up: "No, no, there's an even better way." To the others' amusement he proceeds to construct a little tiny fence around himself, then declares: "I define myself to be on the outside."
66% of the people don't understand percent while the other 42% lie about it.
OLD MATHEMATICIANS never die, they just lose some functions