Proof Points

Two Math Professors Are Sitting In A Pub. "Isn't it disgusting," the first one complains, "How little the general public knows about mathematics? "Well," his colleague replies, "You're perhaps a bit too pessimistic." "I don't think so," the first one replies. "And anyhow, I have to go to the bathroom."
He goes off and the other professor decides to use this opportunity to play a prank on his colleague. He calls over the pretty blonde waitress. "When my friend comes back, I'll wave you over to our table and I'll ask you a question. I would like you to answer, 'x to the third over three', can you do that?"
"Sure." The girl giggles and repeats several times. "x to the third over three, x to the third over three, x to the third over three..."
When the first professor comes back from the washroom, his colleague says, "I still think you're way too pessimistic. I'm sure the waitress knows a lot more about mathematics than you give her credit for."
He gets her attention and motions of her to come to their table.  He then asks her, "Can you tell us what the integral of x squared is?" She replies: "x to the third over three."
The other professor's mouth drops wide open, and his colleague grins smugly when the waitress adds: "Plus C"

Hillbilly Math Education

A hillbilly family's only son saves up money to go to college. After about three years, he comes back home. They are sitting around the dinner table, when the dad says, ''Well son, you done gone to college, so you must be perty smart. Why don't you speak some math fer' us?'' ''Ok, Pa.'' The son then says, ''Pi R squared.'' After a moment, the dad says, ''Why son, they ain't teached ya nothin'! Pie are round, cornbread are square.''

Number Compliment

Q: What did the number zero say to the number eight?
A: "Nice belt."