New Ruling

The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in Washington DC this Christmas season.  This isn't for any religious reason, they simply have not been able to find three wise men and a virgin in the Nation's capitol.  There was no problem, however, finding enough asses to fill the stable.

Hello Flag

Q: What did one flag say to the other flag?
A: Nothing, it just waved.

Pick-up Line - Birthday

I was telling a girl in the bar about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her boobs. "Really" she said, "Go on then, try." After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?"
I said, "Yesterday."