Funny Thoughts

Slam Duck

Q: What do you call a duck who plays basketball?
A: A slam duck.

Anonymous

Welcome to the 21st Century Where Everything is Less

Our phones, wireless
Cooking, fireless
Cars ~ Keyless
Tires ~ Tubeless
Dress ~ Sleeveless
Youth ~ Jobless
Women ~ Topless
Leaders ~ Shameless
Relationships ~ Meaningless
Attitude ~ Careless
Wives ~ Fearless
Babies ~ Fatherless
Feelings ~ Heartless
Education ~ Valueless
Children ~ Mannerless
Everything is becoming LESS but still our hopes are ~ Endless.
In fact we are ~ Speechless
And Government is ~ CLUELESS!!
And our Politicians are ~ WORTHLESS!!
 

Submitted BY: Richard Koenders

Penguin Field Trip

A bus driver on his route sees a van from the zoo stranded on the side of the road. The zoo worker offers the bus driver $100 to help him deliver two dozen penguins. The bus driver agrees and loads the penguins on the bus. An hour later, the zoo worker gets his van fixed and heads to the zoo. On the road, he sees the bus driver and the penguins driving in the opposite direction. He catches up to the bus and pulls them over. The zoo worker yells, "I gave you a $100 to take the penguins to the zoo for me. Why are you still driving them around?" "Calm down," the bus driver says, "I did take the penguins to the zoo. We had change left over, so now I'm taking them to the movies."

Anonymous