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The best jokes and joke writers!

Sherlock Holmes And Watson Camping

Sherlock Holmes and Matthew Watson were on a camping and hiking trip. They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said, "Watson, look up. What do you see?" "Well, I see thousands of stars. ""And what does that mean to you?" "Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?" "To me, it means someone has stolen our tent."

Abo's at the Pearly Gates

St Peter is standing at the pearly gates one day when a pair of Abo's stroll up ."Your names aren't on today's list... let me go and ask the Boss" he says. In God's office he tells the Big Man all about the two Abo's, and God tells Peter to go and tell them to fuck right off. St. Peter takes his leave. 5 minutes later St. Peter runs back into the room and says "they're gone." God says, "the Abo's? Good," and St Peter replies... "NO THE PEARLY GATES!!!"

Top Ten Reasons To Live In Saskatchewan

  1. You never run out of wheat
  2. Those cool Saskatchewan Wheat Pool hats
  3. Cruise control takes on a whole new meaning
  4. Your province is really easy to draw
  5. You never have to worry about roll-back if you have a standard
  6. It takes you two weeks to walk to your neighbor's house
  7. YOUR Roughriders survived
  8.  You can watch the dog run away from home for hours
  9. People will assume you live on a farm
  10. Buying a huge John Deere mower makes sense

No Blondes

Q: .Why are the Japanese so smart?

A: No blondes.

The Chinese Pay Off Their Debts

Jones: "The Chinese make it an invariable rule to settle all their debts on New Year's Day."

Smith: "So I understand, but, then again, the Chinese don't have a Christmas the week before!"