Ethnic / Country Jokes - India Jokes

For centuries, Hindu women have worn a dot on their foreheads.  Most of us have naively thought this was connected with tradition or religion, but the Indian embassy in Ottawa has recently revealed the true story.

When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings a dowry into the union.  On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see whether he has won; a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop, a taxi cab or a motel in the United States.

If nothing there, he must remain in India to answer telephones and provide technical support for computer companies.

Two mountain bred GIs were wandering the streets of Calcutta when an old woman walked by. "Hey, Billy Joe," one said, "I think that's Mother Teresa." "Your nuts." "I'm telling you." They approached the woman and one asked, "Are you Mother Teresa?" The old lady eyed them scornfully. "Fuck off, you goddamn perverts," she hissed, striding off. "Jeez," Billy Joe said, watching her disappear into the crowd, "now we'll never know."

Q: What do you call a gay Indian?

A: A brave sucker.

(Strong east Indian accent:) Hello, you have reached the existential hotline of Ransheesh. I am currently meditating, but if you leave your name and which lifeline you are currently inhabiting at the sound of the Om, I will send good karma waves and contact you when the stars align properly.

Q: What did the Indian say when the white man tied his penis in a knot?

A: "How come?"