Dark Humor Jokes - Suicide Jokes

Roof Top

My sweater is on the roof.
I know I'm a tough personal trainer, but I never thought I'd drive a client to suicide.

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Suicide Jokes) , Word Play Jokes
Copyright © 2014 - Kiel Phillips - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Written By: KielPhillips

Polack Catches Wife In Affair

This Polack came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I am home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun and put it to his head. His wife started laughing. "Don't laugh!" he screams. "You're next!"

Categories: Ethnic / Country Jokes (Polish Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Dark Humor Jokes (Suicide Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Where's my heart?

Mildred was a 93 year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband Earl. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out Earl's old army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart since it was so badly broken in the first place. Not wanting to miss this vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to just exactly where the heart would be. "On a woman," the doctor said, "your heart would be just below your left breast. "Later that night, Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a bullet wound to her left knee.

Categories: Old Age Jokes , Dark Humor Jokes (Suicide Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous