An Amish Offense

Q: What goes: Clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, bang bang, clip clop, clip clop, clip clop?
A: An 'Amish' drive-by shooting

Mother-in-law burial

Two friends meet each other on the street. "Hello! Where are you coming from?" asked Bill. "Oh, don't ask me! I'm coming from the cemetery. I just buried my mother-in-law"  replied Sid. "I'm so sorry!" said Bill,  "But why is your face scratched all over?" "It wasn't so easy!"  said Sid, "She put up a hell of a fight!"

Genie and Mother-in-law

A man finds a lamp and decides to rub the dust off. Then, you guessed it, a Genie appears. The Genie tells the man he will grant him three wishes, but everything the man gets, his mother-in-law gets twice. The man's first wish is for 10 million dollars. The Genie reminds the man that his mother-in-law will get 20 million dollars. The man says, "That's ok." The man's next wish is for a house by the sea. Once again, the Genie reminds the man that his mother-in-law will get two houses by the sea; once again, the man says, "That's okay." The man's last wish is to be beaten half to death!