Pop Culture / Celebrity Jokes - Shark Week
Shark Week - January Jones
January Jones was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark swimming around a man. The man was screaming, "Help me! Help me!" January laughed and laughed! She knew that the shark was never going to help that man!
Shark Week - Bait
One day, the pope was in from Italy and after a rough week of meetings he decided to go see the beach at Martha's Vineyard. When he arrived he saw a man struggling for his life against a shark. Upon a closer look he realized it was John Boehner. Horrified, he starts to call for help when the presidential speed boat pulls up along side Mr. Boehner, with Barack Obama and Joe Biden on board. Joe Biden leans over and pulls Boehner out. Then Barack and Joe begin to beat the shark to death with baseball bats. The two men notice the Pope and land the boat on the beach. The pope says to the men, "I know there has been a lot of strife in this administration, but I can see that you men have mutual respect and would help each other when it really counts. You have my blessings." The pope packs off and drives out of site. Obama asks, "Who was that?" "That was the pope Mr. President, he is all knowing, in touch with God and leader of the Catholic Church," says Biden. Obama says, "Well that's all neat and fine, but he doesn't know anything about shark fishing. Hows the bait holding up?"
Shark Week - Dandruff
Q: How did they know the shark attack victim had dandruff?
A: They found his head and shoulders on the beach.
Shark Week - Lender
Q: To whom do fish go to borrow money?
A: The loan shark!
Shark Week - Nemo
Q: What is a shark's favorite film?
A: Eating Nemo