Size Matters

Q: Why did the mermaid wear seashells?
A: Because the B-shells were too small!

Lisa has Friends

Lisa has 750 friends on Facebook. A week later she adds 150 more to her friends list.
Q: What does Lisa have?
A: Huge boobs.

Toilet Paper Enhancement

A self-conscious wife asks her husband, "Honey, are my boobs too small?" "No, honey, they're fine, but if you want to make them bigger, why don't you rub toilet paper between them?" he suggests. For the next couple of weeks, the wife rubs toilet paper between her boobs several times a day, but sees no results. "Honey, where did you get the idea that this toilet paper thing would work?" "Well, you've been rubbing toilet paper on your ass all these years and that's getting bigger."