Jungle Poker

Q: Why didn't the elephant like to play cards in the jungle?
A: Because there were too many cheetahs.

Death of Energizer Bunny

The world was stunned by the news, this morning, of the death of the Energizer Bunny. He was six years old. Authorities believe that the death occurred at approximately8:42PM last evening. Best known as the irritating pink bunny that kept going and going and going, "Pinkie" as he was known to his friends and relatives, was alone at the time of his death. An autopsy was performed early this morning. Chief Medical Examiner, Dura Cell, concluded that the cause of death was acute cardiac arrest induced by sexual over-stimulation. Apparently, someone had put Mr. Bunny's batteries in backwards, and he kept coming, and coming and coming.....

Refusal to Speak

A command was given to a dog: "SPEAK!"
The dog said in return: "Not without my lawyer present!"