Hydrophobia

Embarrassed to tell anyone about my crocodile being afraid of water. I mean, who do you talk to when you have a reptile dysfunction.

Indian Feathers

A woman was visiting an Indian reservation one day when an Indian came up to her. He had a feather in his hair. "How did you get that feather?" the woman asked. "I screw one squaw," the Indian said. Then, another Indian came up to her. He had two feathers in his hair. "How did you get those feathers?" she asked. "I screw two squaw," he said. Then, an Indian with a headdress of feathers came up to her. "My! How did you get all those feathers?" she asked. "I screw two squaw, four squirrel, five rabbit, eight bear." he answered. "Oh dear!" said the woman. The Indian replied, "No deer, deer jump too high, balls get stuck in bush."

Egg Beaters

Q: Why don't chickens like people?
A: They beat eggs!