Discharge Doctor's Visit

A young lady walks into a doctors office. "Doctor I'm suffering from a terrible discharge." The Doctor lays her down lifts up her dress and has a good probe around and says, "how does that feel?" Young lady, "Oooh doctor that feels lovely... but the discharge is from my ear!!"

The meaning of life

A man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred. The doctor asked the man, "Do you smoke or drink?" "No," he replied, "I've never done either." "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, and fool around with women?" inquired the doctor. "No, I've never done any of those things either." "Well then," said the doctor, "what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"

Soviet Physician

Q: What does the M.D. after a name of a Soviet emigre physician stand for?
A: Mentally deficient.