Profession Jokes - Engineer Jokes

A Programmer and an Engineer

A Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY.  The Programmer leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Programmer persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lot of fun. He explains "I ask you a question and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5."
Again, the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Programmer, now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you$50!  "This catches the Engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game.
The Programmer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The Engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Programmer.  Now, it's the Engineer's turn. He asks the Programmer "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?"  The Programmer looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress.  Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.  After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The Engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep. The Programmer, more than a little miffed, shakes the Engineer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"  Without a word, the Engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the Programmer $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.

Categories: Profession Jokes (Engineer Jokes) , Riddles
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Light Bulb - Engineer

Q: How does an engineer change a light bulb?
A: As long as lighting levels are within operational parameters, he doesn't!

Categories: Light Bulb Jokes , Profession Jokes (Engineer Jokes)
Anonymous

American Aircraft Carriers

There was a conference in France where a number of international engineers were taking part, including French and American. During a break, one of the French engineers came back into the room saying 'Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he intended to do, bomb them?' A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to short facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from their flight deck.. We have eleven such ships; how many does France have?'

Categories: Political Jokes (Foreign Politicians) , Profession Jokes (Engineer Jokes) , Military Jokes (Navy Jokes) , Weather Jokes (Tsunami Jokes)
Anonymous