Monk Scrolls

One day, two monks were in the vaults of the monastery going through the old scrolls. "You see, there are the originals," said the first monk. "All the new scrolls were copied from these."
"Can I see one?" "Sure. This is one outlines the rules for monkdom--" All of a sudden, the monk's face turns white and he falls to his knees. "What? What does it say?" "Celebrate. IT SAYS CELEBRATE!"

Washing Machine Laughing

Q: Why was the washing machine laughing?
A:  Because it was taking the piss out of the pants.

Cheese Bits

Q: What do you call the remnants of blown up cheese?
A: DeBrie.