Missing Credit

I couldn't find my credit card this morning. 
Someone must have swiped it.

Mr. Richman's Three Daughters

Mr. Richman has three daughters. their names are nobody, somebody and crazy. One day nobody and somebody are fighting over a fake eyebrow. Then crazy went to the policeman and she said "Nobody and Somebody are fighting" The policeman looked at her then said "What are you talking about?" Then she said again "Nobody and Somebody are fighting" Then the policeman said "What? are you? Crazy?" Then she said "Yes but how did you know my name?"

Complaints of Married People

Why are complaints of married people like the noise of the waves on the shore? Because they are murmurs of the tied.