Star Wars Vs Star Trek

TOP TEN REASONS WHY THE STAR WARS CHARACTERS WOULD KICK BUTT IN THE STAR TREK UNIVERSE:
10) In the Star Wars Universe weapons are rarely, if ever, set on "STUN."
9) The Enterprise needs a huge engine room with an anti-matter unit and a crew of 20 just to go into warp. The Millennium Falcon does the same thing with R2-D2 and a Wookie.
8) After resisting the Imperial torture droid and Darth Vader, Princess Leia still looked fresh and desirable. After pithy Cardassian starvation torture, Picard looked like hell.
7) One word: Light sabers.
6) Darth Vader could choke the entire Borg empire with one glance.
5) The Death Star doesn't care if a world is class "M" or not.
4) Luke Skywalker is not obsessed with sleeping with every alien he encounters.
3) Jabba the Hutt would eat Harry Mudd for trying to cut in on his action.
2) The Federation would have to attempt to liberate any ship named "Slave."
1) Picard pilots the Enterprise through asteroid belts at one-quarter impulse power. Han Solo floors it.

Top Ten Ways To Annoy Your Waiter

10. Eight hour lunch, two dollar tip.
9. Ask, "Excuse me, are you a really bad singer, or a really bad actor?"
8. After he describes each special, you shout, "Garbage!"
7. Whenever he walks by, cough and mutter, "Minimum wage".
6. Every few seconds, yell, "More waffles, Cuomo!"
5. Insist that before ordering, you be allowed to touch the London broil.
4. Tie tablecloth around neck and say, "You wouldn't charge Superman for dinner, would you?"
3. Every time you eat or drink, cough really hard.
2. As he walks by to the kitchen, scream, "He's gonna spit in the chowder!"
1. Three words: eat the check.

10 Things to Never Say to a Naked Man

Uh...top 10 things not to say to a naked man:

1.  Awww...that's cute
2. Well, at least you're good at other things
3. Do you think it'll fit in my old Barbie® clothes?
4.  My li'l brother has one like that.
5.  Are you cold?
6. ...giggles...
7.  Maybe we should just be friends
8.  Can you make it dance?
9.  Umm...maybe you should get dressed
10.  Oh...look...its hiding!