Saddam Drinking Out
Q: Why doesn't Saddam go out drinking?
A: Why should he when he can get bombed at home?
Saddam HUSSEIN of Iraq wanted a special postage stamp issued, with his picture on it. He so instructed his Postmaster General, stressing that it should be of international quality. The stamps were duly released of the stamp, he began hearing complaints that the stamp was not sticking properly, and become furious. He called the chief of the Secret Service and ordered him to investigate the matter. The chief checked the matter out at several post offices, and then reported on the problem to him. He said: "Sir, the stamp is really of international quality. The problem is, our citizens are spitting on the wrong side!"
Iraqi and American Soldier Injured
A squad of American soldiers was patrolling the Iraqi border, when they came across a badly mangled dead body. As they got closer, they found it was an Iraqi soldier. A short distance up the road, they found a badly mangled American soldier in a ditch on the other side of the road, struggling to breathe. They ran to him, cradled his bruised head and asked him what had happened. "Well," he whispered, "I was walking down this road, armed to the teeth when I came across this heavily armed Iraqi border guard. I looked him right in the eye and shouted, 'Saddam Hussein is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash!'" "He looked me right in the eye and shouted back, 'George W. Bush is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash too!'" "We were standing there shaking hands when the truck hit us."
Saddam's Palaces vs 50 Cent's House
Q: What's the difference between one of Saddam's palaces and a 50 cent's house?
A: You know your'e going to find weapons in 50 cent's house.
Screw The World
Q: What's the difference between Saddam Hussein and Bill Clinton?
A: One wants to screw the world and one already has!