Busted!

The swimming pool opened today. Guess it was just my dumb luck, I got caught taking a pee in the pool.
The darn lifeguard yelled at me so loud, I nearly fell in.

Frog on the Cricket Team

Q: What happened when a frog joined the cricket team?
A: He bowled long hops!

Indian Maiden Reward

A hunter saves an Indian chief being chased by a grizzly bear in the woods. The chief invites the hunter back to his camp to celebrate and reward the hunter for saving his life. At the celebration, the Indian chief says to the hunter, "I have a special surprise for you: 500 of my prettiest Indian maidens. You look at all of them and choose one. She will be your wife." The chief clapped his hands and 500 young, beautiful Indian maidens appeared, topless, before them. With closer inspection, the hunter notices that none of them have nipples on their breasts. "Why don't these maidens have nipples on their breasts?" he asks the chief. The chief turns to the hunter with surprise: "What -- you've never heard of the Indian Nipple-less 500?"