Toilet Seat

Q: How many men does it take to put down a toilet seat?
A: Who knows - it's never been done.

A Man's Intention

Q:  What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A:  The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Fortunate Twist of Fate

Two brothers enlisting in the Army were getting their physicals. During the inspection, the doctor was surprised to discover that both of them possessed incredibly long, oversized penises. "How do you account for this?" he asked the brothers. "It's hereditary, sir," the older one replied. "I see," said the doctor, writing in his file. "Your father's the reason for your elongated penises?" "No sir, our mother." "Your mother? You idiot, women don't have penises!" "I know, sir," replied the recruit, "but she only had one arm, and when it came to getting us out of the bathtub, she had to manage as best she could."