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Sex Jokes - Masturbation Jokes
Covid 19 Reduction
A middle manager has a zoom call with his boss Monday morning. He's told that the Covid 19 quarantine is hurting business and he has to furlough one of his employees. He's really upset. Everyone in his department does a good job and it doesn't seem fair. So for the next 2 days he racks his brain trying to figure out who to let go. On Tuesday afternoon he sees Jack and Jill standing six feet apart having a discussion. He says to himself, "Okay it's going to be one of them." He spends the next few days scrutinizing what each of them does. Everything is equal. Productivity. Time off. Reports. Everything. He's in a quandary. It's Friday afternoon and he knows his going to have to think about this all weekend. Everyone has left the office except Jack and Jill, who are getting ready to leave. Jill comes over to say goodbye. "Have a good weekend boss. Hey you don't look so good - do you have the virus?" He looks at her and says "No, but I'm having a tough time here. I can't decide if I should lay you or Jack off." And she looks at him and says "Well, I have to catch a bus, so I suggest you jack off."
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The Staff of Life
Little Johnny's is coming home from the store swinging the loaf of bread in one hand and the other hand in his pants pocket.
Along came Priest Joe, who thought to himself "This is a good opportunity to quote from the bible to Little Johnny."
He walked up to Little Johnny and said "Little Johnny, I see that you have the Staff of Life in your hand. What do you have in the other?"
Little Johnny replied, "A loaf of bread Father."
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Santa Joke
Santa comes once a year - but when he does he fills your stocking!
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