Sex Jokes

JokerZ offers a HUGE collection of funny dirty jokes. Check out our professionally curated categories for hilarious adult jokes and sex jokes. Set your filter on Risque and Uncensored to browse dirty knock-knock jokes, inappropriate jokes and one liners from professional joke writers. Over 3000 of the best dirty jokes will have you ROFL. Share jokes anonymously with friends or post on social sites.

Hard Egg

Two eggs were kissing on a bed when the female egg said, "I have to go change. I'll be back in a minute." Five minutes later, the the female egg walked out in a slinky 'egg'lige, rubbing her hands up and down her smooth, oval-shaped body. Instantly, the male egg slapped his hands on the top of his head, covering it completely. "What are you doing?" the female egg asked. He replied, "The last time I was this hard, someone cracked me on the head with a spoon."

Categories: Sex Jokes , Food Jokes
Anonymous

The Leprechaun

A man walks into the bathroom, and steps up to a urinal. He can't help but notice the short man at the urinal next to him, and the large penis this man has. He says to the short man, "Excuse me, I couldn't help but notice what a large penis you have." The short man replies, "I am a leprechaun, and I can grant you three wishes." The man is kind of skeptical, but he decides to believe him anyway. "OK, "He says, "I want to live in a mansion." The short man replies, "Sure. Tomorrow morning you will wake up in it." The man says, "Next, I want a beautiful girlfriend." "OK," the short man replies, "Tomorrow you will wake up next to her." The man is still not sure whether to believe him, but he continues. "I want a penis as large as yours." "Alright, but there is one catch, the short man replies. "What's that, the man asks?" "I have to have sex with you from behind, the short man says. The other man thinks for a second, and decides anything is worth getting a penis that large. "OK, go right ahead." The short man starts to do his thing, and the other man says, "I can't believe I'm gonna have a penis as big as yours." The short man replies, "I can't believe you thought I was a leprechaun!"

Categories: Sex Jokes (Gay Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts) , Appearance Jokes (Midget / Dwarf Jokes)
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Anonymous

Jason Kuller Dirty Talk

My last girlfriend wanted me to talk dirty to her in the bed. I'm no wild-man in the sack. Don't let the glasses and the hip threads fool you. I had a hard time with the degrading, profane language because I was raised a proverbial nice, Jewish boy. So this is how I would talk dirty to her, it's embarrassing, "You really like my schmeckle, don't you? I am gonna schtupp you so hard. Don't make me stick it in your tushie."

Categories: Religion Jokes (Jewish Jokes) , Word Play Jokes , Sex Jokes
Anonymous