Getting What You Ask For!

A traveler knocked on the door of the house where a cabdriver had told him he could be sexually accommodated. An eye-level panel slid open and a female voice asked what he wanted. "I want to get screwed," said the man. "OK, mister, but this is a private club, so slip twenty bucks as an initiation fee through the mail slot,"  answered the voice. The man slid his $20 bucks in, the panel was closed. Minutes passed and nothing happened. He began to pound on the door insistently, and the panel slid open again. "Hey," exclaimed the sport, "I want to get screwed!" "What?" said the voice, "Again?"

Viagra Ingredients Revealed!

After much research and millions of dollars, our scientists have discovered the secret ingredients to Viagra!
VIAGRA INGREDIENT LIST: (TopSecret!)

• 3% Vitamin E
• 2% aspirin
• 2%ibuprofen
• 1% Vitamin C
• ...and . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
• ...92% Fix-A-Flat!

Be Careful In The Theatre

Two girls are sitting in a movie-theater. "That man beside me is fumbling his crotch", one whispers to the other. "Just ignore it", is the answer. "Easy for you to say. He's using my hand!".