Eminem's Divorce

• That comment about Elton being "twice the woman" she ever was.
• Caught Eminem fantasizing about killing other women.
• Sick of hiding her love for the Insane Clown Posse.
• Sure, he talks and raps like a black man, but when he takes down his pants...
• Recently overtaken by a strange and unfamiliar compulsion to live past the age of 35.
• I mean come on, people... the dude lost to Steely Dan.
• Thanks to a recent surgery, her head's no longer implanted deep within her own rectum.
  
  And The Top Reason Eminem's Wife Filed For Divorce. . .
• Sick of dating a rich, famous, abusive bastard. Would like to try a poor, unknown abusive bastard for a change.

I Don't Mind Your Talking

I don't mind that you are talking, so long as you don't mind that I'm not listening!

Wrong Size

A woman that was on her death-bed turned to her husband telling him he should get married soon after she'll die, to which the man said-Okay. Then she told him that he may bring the new wife to her home, Okay said the man, and you may give her my silver-Okay said he, you will also give her my jewelry-Okay, said the man, and you will also give her my dresses, said the woman -"This will not be possible," answered the man - "you see, you are size 8 and she is size 10."