Political Jokes

I love Christmas lights. They remind me of the people who voted for Obama. They all hang together, half of the little bastards don't work, and the ones that do aren't that bright!

Mexican tap water

A rattlesnake with a "pet me" sign

A fart when I have diarrhea

An elevator ride with Ray Rice

Taking pills offered by Bill Cosby

An Obama Nuclear deal with Iran

A Palestinian on a motorcycle

Gas station Sushi

Brian Williams news reports

Prayers for peace from Al Sharpton

A priest walked into a barber shop in Washington, D.C. After he got his haircut, he asked how much it would be. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the Lord. "The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 prayer books and a thank you note from the priest in front of the door. Later that day, a police officer came in and got his hair cut. He then asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the community. "The next morning, he came to work and there were a dozen donuts and a thank you note from the police officer. Then, a House of Representatives member came in and got a haircut. When he was done he asked how much it was. The barber said, "No charge. I consider it a service to the country."The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 House Democrats in front of the door.

When "Air Force One" prepares to land, the captain speaks over the intercom: "The seatbelt sign is on Mr. President, would you please put the stewardess in the upright position."

Q:  What does Clinton say to interns as they leave his office?

A: "Don't hit your head on the desk."