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The best jokes and joke writers!

Pick Up Line Rejections!

1. Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?" Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

2. The most memorable rebuttal to a turn down (used by the guy who used to live across the hall from me in residence) when he asked a girl to dance and she refused: Man: "Want to Dance?" Woman: "No, thank you." Man: "Don't thank me, thank God somebody asked you."

3. Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?" Woman: "It's in the phone book." Man: "But I don't know your name." Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

4.Man: "So what do you do for a living?" Woman: "Female impersonator."

5. Q: What sign were you born under? A: No Parking.

6. After hearing a pick-up line: Woman: "I like your approach, now let's see your departure."

7. A girlfriend of mine once had a graying man in his 60's approach her in a club while she was in college with the line, "Where have you been all my life?" She took one glance at him and said, "For the first half of it, I probably wasn't born yet."

8. A friend of mine came up with a very quick response over vacation. We were walking down the street and I glanced at a girl who had just walked by. She turned around and said to me, "What are you looking at!?" My friend, walking next to me came to the rescue, "He thought you were good looking, but he was mistaken."

9. While at college, a few friends were discussing how their "passes" had been rejected by the intended female receiver. One of the ladies explained how she handled it once... When the guy, obviously getting irritated, blurted out something like, "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason!" She responded, "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

10. "Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

11. Man: "Hey, baby, if you come home with me, I can show you a really good time." Woman: "You know what your problem is? Your mouth is writing checks that your body can't cash."

Sign Pick-Up Line

Man: "Hey baby, what's your sign?"

Woman: "Do not enter."

Yours Or Mine?

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.