Career Day

Teacher asks the children to discuss what their Dad's do for a living. Little Mary says: "My Dad is a lawyer. He puts the bad guys in jail." Little Jack says: "My Dad is a doctor. He makes all the sick people better." All the kids in the class had their turn except  Little Johnny. Teacher says: "Johnny, what does your Dad do ?" Johnny says: "My Dad is dead." "I'm sorry to hear that, but what did he do before he died ?" "He turned blue and shit on the carpet."

Little LeBron and Dictation

Little LeBron was in English class, when his teacher asked him to use 'dictate' in a sentence. He things for a minute and says, "Lass night I heard Daddy askin' Momma, 'how do my dictate?'"

LIttle Suzzie in School

Little Suzie goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Suzie waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Suzie, what is your multi-syllable word?" Suzie says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Suzie, that's a mouthful." Suzie replies, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a bl*wjob."