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The best jokes and joke writers!

A Game of Golf

A man walked into the clubhouse and noticed a friend sitting in a corner wearing a neck brace. He sat down and asked his mate what happened."Well, I was playing golf and I hit my ball into the rough," replied his friend. "Then I met a chick who was looking for her ball too. Finding mine, I thought I'd give her a hand. There was a cow nearby and I noticed that every time the cow twitched its tail there was a flash of white. So I went over to it and lifted its tail and sure enough there was the ball. I called out to the chick and said, 'Lady, does this look like yours?' And the bitch hit me in the neck with her driver!"

Your Teeth

Your teeth are so big when you sneeze you bite your chest.

Kiss Goodbye Insult

You're so ugly, your husband takes you with him everywhere he goes, so he doesn't have to kiss you goodbye.

Yo Mama - Tears

Yo mama so ugly, when she cries, the tears run down her back.

LOFT

Three men were out golfing with the club pro one day. The first man teed off and hit a dribbling ball about 60 yards. He turned to the pro and asked, "What did I do wrong?" The pro replied, "Loft." The next golfer teed off and hooked the ball into the woods. He asked the pro the same question. The pro again answered, "Loft." The third man teed off and sliced it into a pond. He too asked the pro, "What did I do wrong?" Again, "Loft." As they were walking down the fairway, the first man finally spoke up to the pro. "All three of us hit completely different tee shots and yet when we asked you what we did wrong, you gave the same exact answer every time. "So what does Loft mean?" asked the three men. "The pro shook his head and said, "Lack of Friggin' Talent!"