Yo Mama - Santa Claus
Yo' Mama is so poor, she told your little sister that Santa Claus was dead.
Gift for The Wife
After being away on business for a week before Christmas, Tom thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift. "How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a bottle costing $50. "That's a bit much," said Tom, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30. "Thats still quite a bit," Tom groused. Growing disgusted, the clerk brought out a tiny $15 bottle. Tom grew agitated, "What I mean," he said, "is I'd like to see something real cheap. "So the clerk handed him a mirror.
Santa comes once a year - but when he does he fills your stocking!
Q: Why does a cat take so long to wrap Christmas presents?
A: She won't stop until they're purr-fect.
Why Santa Has No Kids
Q: Why doesn't Santa have any children?
A: Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.