The Aged Patient's Lowered Sex Drive

The aged patient doddered into the doctor's office with a serious complaint. "Doc, you've got to do something to lower my sex drive." "Come on now Mr Peters," the doctor said, "your sex drives all in your head." "That's what I mean, you've got to lower it a little."

Calvinist Lightbulbs

Q: How many Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. God has predestined when the light will be on. Calvinists do not change light bulbs. They simply read the instructions and pray the light bulb will be the one that has been chosen to be changed.

Why Ask Why - 3

• When they ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
• If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?
• Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is?
• Why do 'tug'boats push their barges?
• Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game', when we are already there?
• Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
• Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?
• Why does one get in trouble for wreckLESS driving?
• Does a fish get cramps after eating?
• Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?