Japan's Quality Standard

This speaks a lot about the Japanese quality standards and also cultural misunderstandings. They're still laughing about this at IBM. Apparently the computer giant decided to have some parts manufactured in Japan as a trial project. In the specifications, they set out that they will accept three defective parts per 10,000. When the delivery came in there was an accompanying letter. "We, Japanese people, had a hard time understanding North American business practices. But the three defective parts per 10,000 have been separately manufactured and have been included in the consignment. Hope this pleases you."

Sven and Olie

Sven and Olie died and went to Hell.  After awhile, the Devil came by to see how his new guests were doing. To his amazement, he found Sven and Olie were still wearing their winter gear and seemed to be quite comfortable. The Devil asked why they weren't hot. Olie replied, "We come from Minnesota where it's always cold. This is feeling pretty good to us." This upset the Devil, so he turned up the thermostat. Awhile later the Devil looked in again on Sven and Olie. To his surprise he found they were still wearing their winter gear. The Devil questioned them on it again. "You have to remember that we are from Minnesota and it's very, very cold there. This is feeling nice to us." The Devil was even madder at this, so he turned the thermostat all the way up to maximum temperature. The Devil waited some time and then went back to Sven and Olie. This time he found they had only unzipped their coats, but still had all their winter clothes on. The Devil couldn't understand what was going on. The punishment down here was supposed to be the unbearable heat. It wasn't working on these two. He had to ask again what the deal was. Sven replied, "We are Minnesotans and we just got over a freezing winter. This is really great for Olie and Me. A light flickered in the Devil's mind. He went to the thermostat and turned it off. He thought if the heat wasn't a punishment, maybe he'd give them some freezing temperatures. A little while later the Devil came back to check in on Sven and Olie only to find them cheering and giving each other high fives, happier than ever! The Devil questioned them on their actions and Sven said happily, "Back home they always said, the Vikings will win the Super Bowl when Hell freezes over!!!"

Irish Pilots

(Setting the scene: Ballymun outside of Dublin has a reputation as a rough spot) Fifteen minutes into Aer Lingus Flight EL109 from Madrid to Dublin the Plane encounters a serious problem with the instrument landing systems. In a fit of panic, Paddy the pilot turns to his co-pilot and says. "Jazus Mick...We'll have to turn back...none of the equipment is working!." Mick says to Paddy, "No Problem...sure I can tell where we are by sticking my hand out the Window!' "OK!" says Paddy, "Where are we then?" Mick winds down the window and sticks his hand out and replies, "Well Paddy, I reckon were over the Bay of Biscay. The humidity seems to be gone out of the air. This is caused by the seawater. Just head North" "Brilliant!" replies Paddy, and precedes north bound. Fifteen minutes later Paddy asks, "Where are we now Mick?" Mick winds down the window and sticks his hand out and replies, "We're over the English Channel now. The air is much cooler here. Just head in a north easterly direction." Thirty minutes Later Paddy asks: " Where are we now Mick?" Mick winds down the window and sticks his hand out and replies, "Were over the Ballymun flats. Quick...bank left here and you should be on course for runway one. Paddy, responds and 5 minutes later the plane lands safely on runway one. Paddy turns to Mick and says, "That was brilliant, but, tell me, how did you know we were over the Ballymun Flats." "Well!" said Mick, "when I pulled my hand back in, my watch was gone!"