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The best jokes and joke writers!

Lightbulb - Junkie

Q: How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Two: One to roll it, and one to light it up.

Successful Night

After a night of drink, drugs and wild sex, John woke up to find himself next to a really ugly woman. That's when he realized he had made it home safely.

In The Bag

A "tourist," supposedly on a golf holiday, stood in line at the customs counter. While making idle chatter, the customs official thought it odd that the golfer didn't know what a handicap was. The officer then asked the tourist to demonstrate his swing. He did - backwards. A substantial amount of narcotics was found in the golf bag.

Old Farmers

Old farmers never die, they just spade away

Mexican Benzos

Q: Why did the Mexican take Xanax?

A: For Hispanic attacks.