I'm Not Your Son

A young boy asked his mother where babies come from and she answered "Go ask your father." He asked his father the same question and he answered "Go ask your mother!" Later that day at dinner the boy announced "I know that I am not your son because neither one you know where babies come from."

Sex During Pregnancy

Sandra and her husband Jim are expecting a baby in 2 months. One day Jim comes home from work and asks Sandra, ''Why haven't we had sex in so long?'' ''You know I'm worried it will hurt the baby.'' Sandra told him. ''I'll be really gentle. I promise.'' Jim tells her. Sandra protests but Jim manages to finally convince her that he won't hurt the baby so they have sex. Two months later Sandra gives birth to a baby boy. When the baby was born he looked at the doctor and says, ''Are you my father?'' The doctor shakes his head, then to Sandra, ''Are you my father?'' ''No, I'm your mother.'' she tells him. Finally the baby sees Jim and says, ''Are you my father?'' Jim nods, The baby starts hitting him on the head and says ''How does this feel?''

The Doctor: Good News, Bad News

The doctor looked at the woman who had come to him for an examination. "Mrs. Brown, I have some good news for you." The woman said, "I'm glad to hear that doctor, but I'm Miss Brown, not Mrs." "Oh. Well, in that case Miss Brown," said the doctor without changing expression, "I have some bad news for you."