Bar Jokes - Walks Into a Bar

Tried That Once

A man walked into a bar on a slow night and sat down. After a few minutes, the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink. He replied, "No thanks. I don't drink. I tried it once, but I didn't like it." So the bartender said, "Well, would you like a cigarette?" But the man said, "No thanks. I don't smoke. I tried it once, but I didn't like it." The bartender asked him if he'd like to play a game of pool, and again the man said, "No thanks. I don't like pool. I tried it once, but I didn't like it. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't be here at all, but I'm waiting for my son." The bartender said, "Your only son, I'm guessing."

Categories: Bar Jokes (Walks Into a Bar) , Alcohol Jokes , Drug Jokes , Word Play Jokes
Anonymous

Wife and Best Friend

A man walks into a bar and orders a triple scotch. The barman gives it to him and he gulps in down in one swoop. "Hey buddy, you must be having it rough. Whats up with you?" says the bartender. "Well, I got home early from work last night and found my wife and my best friend in bed with each other!" "That's terrible pal, the next drink is on the house." So the bartender gives him another tripple scotch and again he gulps it down. "If you don't mind me asking, what did you say to your wife?" "I told her I've had enough and I want a divorce!" "Good for you! You said the right thing.  So what did you say to your best friend?" "Well, I walked up to him, looked him straight in the eyes and said ... BAD DOG!"

Categories: Bar Jokes (Walks Into a Bar) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Bestiality Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Donkey or Doberman?

The attractive young woman was sitting at the bar alone, when the lounge lizard made his move. "I'm here," he breathed huskily, "to fulfill your every sexual fantasy." The woman turned and looked at him. Her lips parted and she moistened them with the tip of her tongue. She leaned toward him with her hands on her thighs, and her eyes opened to the size of dinner plates. She paused just a second and then delivered the crusher line, "You've got a large donkey or Doberman?"

Categories: Bar Jokes (Walks Into a Bar) , Sex Jokes (Bestiality Jokes) , Sex Jokes (One Night Stand Jokes) , Sexist Jokes (About Men)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous