Animal Jokes - Donkey Jokes

There was an old man named Bozo, and all he had was a female donkey. One day he wins the lottery and gets $50,000. He doesn't know what to do with his money, so he decides to spend a night in a five star hotel. He asks for the finest room and starts going up the stairs with his female donkey. The manager sees him and asks where he's going with his donkey.
"Anywhere I go, she goes." "I'm sorry, sir," said the manager, "but you can't take the donkey upstairs. Leave it down here with us and we'll take good care of her." So Bozo goes up to his room and opens the door. Everything is made of gold, there is a table full of food, and a huge television. He doesn't want to ruin anything so he takes his raggedy coat off and sleeps on the floor. The next morning the manager comes up to the room and asks how his night was. ''Great!'' replied Bozo. ''How much do I have to pay?'' he asks. ''One thousand dollars for the food.'' ''But I haven't touched the food." ''It was right there, so you should have. Two thousand dollars for the TV." ''But I didn't even know how to turn the damn thing on!'' ''It was there, so you should have. Five thousand for sleeping on the bed." ''But I slept on the floor!''
''It was there. Your total is eight thousand dollars." ''You owe me ten thousand dollars for screwing my donkey.'' ''But sir, I didn't screw your donkey.'' ''It was there. You should have!''

Every day after work two blondes would look for their cars together. Since they could never remember where they parked, they would sit around until all the cars were gone and they could spot their vehicles. One blonde says "We need to find a faster way to get home." The next day, they come to work on a donkey. After work they come out and see a donkey tied to the fence. I think we're going to have to wait again, " says the one blonde. "I'm not convinced that's our donkey." "Why not?" asks the second blonde. The first blonde says, "Well, this donkey only has one a**hole, and this morning when we rode in, I distinctly overhead someone say, 'Hey look at those two a**holes on that donkey."

Yo' Mama is like a donkey: everybody rides the ass.

Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey and an onion?

A: A piece of ass that'll bring a tear to your eye.

The king wanted to go fishing, so he called on the royal weather forecaster and inquired as to the weather forecast for the next few hours. The weatherman assured him that there was no chance of rain so the king went fishing with his wife, the queen.  On the way he met a farmer on his donkey. Upon seeing the king the farmer said, "Your Majesty, you should return to the palace!  In just a short time I expect a huge amount of rain to fall in this area." The king was polite and considerate, he replied, "I hold the palace  meteorologist in high regard.  He is an extensively educated and experienced professional and I pay him very high wages.  He gave me a very different forecast. I trust him." So the king continued on his way.  However, a short time later a torrential rain fell from the sky.  The King and Queen were totally soaked and their entourage chuckled upon seeing them in such a shameful condition. Furious, the king returned to the palace and gave the order to fire the professional. Then he summoned the farmer and offered him the prestigious and high paying role of royal forecaster. The farmer said, "Your Majesty, I do not know anything about forecasting.  I obtain my information from my donkey.  If I see my donkey's ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain. "So the king hired the donkey. And thus began the practice of hiring dumb asses to work in the government and occupy its highest and most influential positions. The practice is unbroken to this date which is why the donkey remains as the democratic party logo.