Sports Jokes - Golf Jokes

Golfing with Nuns

This guy unexpectedly got the day off and decided he would spend it on the golf course. After arriving at the club house, he was told that the only way he could play today was if he was willing to play along with three nuns. He agreed and set off with the nuns in tow. At the first hole he said, "After you", and the nuns insisted that he go first. He took a giant swing and sliced it into a nearby bunker. "Goddammit!" he said. "Oh, my, please refrain from using that kind of language around us," said the nun. "I'm so sorry, ma'am, it won't happen again." The nun gets up to the tee and her ball travels about twenty yards, hits a tree, and bounces back behind them. "Well shit, Goddamn, hell, fuck!" exclaims the nun. "Hey, what did you tell me about that?" asks the man. "Yeah, well, you didn't hit a fuckin' tree."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

The Golfer vs. The Fisherman

Q: What's the difference between a golfer and a fisherman?
A: When a golfer lies he doesn't have to bring anything home to prove it!

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Childbirth Class

The room was full of pregnant ladies and their partners, and the Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan. The teacher then announced, "Ladies, exercise is good for you. Walking is especially beneficial. And, gentlemen, it wouldn't hurt you to take the time to go walking with your partner!" The room really got quiet. Finally, a man in the middle of the group raised his hand. "Yes," replied the teacher. "Is it alright if she carries a golf bag while we walk?"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous