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Sexist Jokes - Private Parts
The Freudian Slip
Ted and John are setting in the bar and John asked Ted if he bought the train tickets to go see the Steelers game this weekend. Ted says yea and kinda looked a little funny. John said is there anything wrong? Ted said naw, everythings OK. They take a few more sips of beer and Ted ask John if he had ever embarrassed himself by saying something he didnít mean to say. John said sure, it happens to everyone. Ted said there ís a name for that isn't there... you know, where you accidently use the wrong words when you are trying to say something. Yea, says John, it ís called a Freudian slip. Yea, thats it said Ted, I couldnít think of the word. Why are you asking said John? Well, yesterday I went to the train station to get the train tickets for Pittsburg, and the girl selling tickets has this incredible set of jugs. I pulled out the money and laid it on the counter and asked her to give me two pickets to Titsburg and then had to embarrassingly say I mean two tickets to Pittsburg. God, it just embarrassed the shit out of me. You ever done anything that stupid? Funny you would ask, said John. Just this morning my wife and I were having breakfast... I meant to say, dear, would you please pass me the sugar, but instead I said, "You fucking bitch, youíve ruined my life."
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Crust...
Q: What is good on pizza but bad on pussy?
A: Crust
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Relativity
Don't try to understand the theory of relativity. Relativity is like an erection - the more you think about it, the harder it gets.
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