Sex Jokes - Prostitute Jokes

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The Australian Way

After working for years, a hooker finally retired and, being afraid of spending the rest of her life alone, she decided to marry. She had been with so many perverted men over the years that she felt she needed a change and would only get one by marrying a virgin male near her age. She took out ads in newspapers around the world seeking a male virgin who was 55 years old. She finally narrowed her choice to an Australian computer programmer. After a thorough background check, she was satisfied that he had indeed never been with a woman and they were married. On their wedding night, she went into the bathroom to change into her nightie. When she came back out, she found that her new husband had taken the bed and everything in the room and stacked it in one corner of the room. Thinking this was rather kinky, she said to her husband, "I thought you had never been with a woman." He replied, "That's true, but if it's anything like screwing a kangaroo, we're going to need all the room we can get!"

Categories: Sex Jokes (Bestiality Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Prostitute Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Wedding Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Show Some Respect

A man was looking for a cheap prostitute in a brothel. He went up to the pimp, and asked him what he had. The pimp showed him a blonde whore for $50, but she was far too expensive. The pimp then showed him a brunette for $10, but she was also too expensive. Finally the pimp showed him a whore for $1, who happened to have her legs open ready. The man agreed, but the pimp said he must wear a black condom. So the man wore the condom and bonked his heart out and had the time of his life. He enjoyed it so much he went back the next day for the same $1 whore, and again had to wear a black condom. Again the prostitute had her legs open ready. When he went the day after, he asked the pimp why he must wear a black condom? The pimp told him "To show respect for the dead."

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Corpse Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Prostitute Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Blind Hooker

Q: Have you heard about that blind hooker?
A: You've gotta hand it to her!

Categories: Sex Jokes (Prostitute Jokes) , Word Play Jokes , Riddles , Disability Jokes (Blind Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous