Sex Jokes - Masturbation Jokes

JokerZ offers a HUGE collection of funny dirty jokes. Check out our professionally curated categories for hilarious adult jokes and sex jokes. Set your filter on Risque and Uncensored to browse dirty knock-knock jokes, inappropriate jokes and one liners from professional joke writers. Over 3000 of the best dirty jokes will have you ROFL. Share jokes anonymously with friends or post on social sites.

An Orgasmic Problem

A woman went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got a big problem, doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out an outrageous yell." "My dear," the doctor said, "that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is." "The problem is," she complained, "he keeps waking me up!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Triplets

One night a lady pregnant with triplets was walking by and a masked robber ran out of a bank and shot her in the stomach three times. Her doctor told her that he couldn't perform surgery because it would be too risky. All was well for 16 years when one of the girls came running into the room crying. "Whats wrong?" asked the mother. "I was taking a pee and a bullet came out". "It's okay" said the mom and explained what happened 16 years ago. A week later the other girl came running into the room crying, "I know what happened, you were taking a pee and a bullet came out?" "Yes" replied the girl. "It's okay" said the mom and explained what happened 16 years ago. A week later the boy came running in crying, "I know what happened, you were taking a pee and a bullet came out. "No" replied the boy, "I was playing with myself and shot the dog!!!!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Charlie Goes Home

Charlie was in a bar and three babes came up and started hitting on him. He asked if they wanted to come over to his house later. They agreed to come over at after they went home and got ready.
Charlie had a friend who worked in a drugstore, so he went to see him. He asked his friend if he had anything that would keep him hard all night long. The man laughed and handed him a bottle of pills instructing him not to take more than one. Once at home, Charlie figured with three women he should take three pills, so he gulped them down.
The next day Charlie showed up at the drugstore to see his friend. Asking for some liniment, he showed him his dick which was ripped to shreds. In disbelief, his friend asked if he was sure that he wanted to put liniment on his dick.
Charlie replied "No,I need it for my arms — the women never showed up!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous