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Sex Jokes
Speaking of Sex
A gentleman is permitted to join a private club. The initiation consists of holding an unprepared on-the-spot lecture, on a theme starting on a letter which is alotted to him. The man gets an S, and chooses to give his impromptu lecture on Sex. Coming home and reporting to his wife, he chickens out and says that he spoke about Sailing. The next day, his wife meets a club member who says her hubby "gave a very good lecture last night -haw haw haw." The wife recalled; "That's strange, I must say. He has only done it twice. The first time he got sick, and the second time he lost his hat."
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Arthritis Is So Cruel
"I'll tell you," he said, "I've learned that arthritis is the cruellest disease." "Crueller than cancer?" his friend asked. "You bet," the first codger replied, "It makes every single one of your joints stiff, except the right one."
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Partial Dosage
An elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked the pharmacist for Viagra. The pharmacist said "That's no problem. How many do you want?" The man answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces." The pharmacist said, "That won't do you any good." The elderly gentleman said, "That's alright. I don't need them for sex anymore as I am over 80 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes."
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