Things Change With Marriage

"Before I married my wife," a husband once said, "it was nothing but wine, women, and song. Now that I'm her husband, it's beer, mama, and TV."

Axial Attraction

Q: Why did Mr. ohm marry Mrs. ohm?
A: He couldn't resistor

Explanation

The newlyweds arrived at the front desk of the posh ocean-side resort in Hilton Head. They were looking all fresh, and eager to enjoy their two week vacation/honeymoon. The stunning blonde at the front desk smiled and said, "Well, hi Jimmy, how ya been lover? Long time no see." A frosty silence prevailed until the couple reached their room. Once inside, the piqued bride demanded: "And just who was THAT woman!?" The groom wiped his brow and said, "Just relax honey. Please! I'm going to have enough trouble explaining you to her."