More Wonderments!

If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
What do chickens think we taste like?
What do people in China call their good plates?
What do you call a male ladybug?
What hair color do they put on the drivers license of a bald man?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
When they first invented the clock, how did they know what time it was to set it?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids?"
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkey's and apes?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word lisp to have a "s" in it?
If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

Goofy Wonderings

• Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds" fee on money they already know you don't have?
• If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?
• In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?
• How come there aren't B batteries?
• If the post office has machines that can sort snail mail at 1000's of times per minute, then why do they give it to a little old man on a bike to deliver?
• If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
• How do you know that honesty is the best policy until you have tried some of the others?
• How do you throw away a garbage can?
• How does a thermos know if the drink should be hot or cold?
• What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?
• Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up?
• Why is it that you must wait until night to call it a day?
• What if the Hokey Pokey IS what its all about?
• When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?
• What happened to the first 6 "ups"?

Heart Transplant

A man needing a heart transplant is told by his doctor that the only heart available is that of a sheep. The man finally agrees and the doctor transplants the sheep heart into the man. A few days after the operation, the man comes in for a checkup. The doctor asks him "How are you feeling?" The man replies, "Not BAAAAD!"